Posted in Uncategorized on January 28th, 2012 by admin – Comments Off
The editor of the local paper was unable to secure advertising from one of the business men of the town, who asserted stoutly that he himself never read ads., and didn't believe anyone else did.
"Will you advertise if I can convince you that folks read the ads.?" the editor asked.
"If you can show me!" was the sarcastic answer. "But you can't."
In the next issue of the paper, the editor ran a line of small type in an obscure corner. It read:
"What is Jenkins going to do about it?"
The business man, Jenkins, hastened to seek out the editor next day. He admitted that he was being pestered out of his wits by the curious. He agreed to stand by the editor's explanation in the forthcoming issue, and this was:
"Jenkins is going to advertise, of course."
Having once advertised, Jenkins advertises still.
Posted in Uncategorized on January 27th, 2012 by admin – Comments Off
A good question is never answered. It is not a bolt to be tightened
into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the
hope of greening the landscape of idea. The difference between a seed
and an inert speck can be hard to see, but only one of them will grow
and return itself in kind and be multiplied.
- John Ciardi
Posted in Uncategorized on January 27th, 2012 by admin – Comments Off
As a younger man, I was in great shape. As an airline pilot , I was
required to have a Flight physical every six months.
The nurse took the basic data, weight, height, and blood pressure. My
pressure was good, but the heart rate was below 40 beats per minute.
"I cannot put that number down. You'll be denied a physical.",she said.
"What can I do?", I replied.
She held my hand and winked,saying, "Just think about that for a minute!"
Retaking my blood pressure and heart rate, she stated, "53 will be OK,
but you really know how to hurt a girl!"
Floyd Coons, (retired) Northwest Airlines
Sent by Robert
Posted in Uncategorized on January 27th, 2012 by admin – Comments Off
A teacher was working with a group of underprivileged children,
trying to broaden their horizons through sensory exploration.
With their eyes closed, they would feel objects from pumice
stones to pine cones and smell aromatic herbs and exotic fruits.
Then one day, the teacher brought in a great variety of lifesavers,
more flavors than you could ever imagine.
"Children, I'd like you to close your eyes and taste these,"
announced the teacher. Without difficulty, they managed to identify
the taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the teacher
had them put honey flavored lifesavers in their mouths, every one
of the children was stumped.
"I'll give you a hint," said the teacher. "It's something your
Daddy and Mommy probably call each other all the time."
Instantly, one of the children spat the lifesaver out of his mouth
and shouted, "Spit 'em out, you guys, they're assholes!"
Posted in Uncategorized on January 27th, 2012 by admin – Comments Off
There was a Young Lady of Bute,
Who played on a silver-gilf flute;
She played several jigs
To her uncle's white pigs,
That amusing Young Lady of Bute.
